Money. That's what I want.

I'm not gonna lie to you. I like having money. Who doesn't? Come on. Don't pretend like you don't like having it. But it's true what they say- the more you have, the more you want. I'm about to get a little vulnerable here.
First off, let me say, I'm an emotional spender. When something bad happens, a new dress(or shirt, or hoodie, or shoes) makes me feel better. I'm not really sure if that's healthy, but that's another topic that we will explore at a later date. That's when I'll let my psychological training come out.
And I'll begin to tell you my tale here- in other posts I have written about how I grew up poor and have felt the need to fill the gap by buying clothes. I go in and out of these phases where I do really good and then I have a breakdown and buy a lot of things. (I need to find a healthy balance.) This has caused me to get into a little bit of debt. I was doing reaaalllyyy good for a while. Then. It. Happened. I have been wanting to move to DC for a while. I haven't b/c I'm lazy and I can't seem to find anything good when I do look. This past September, I FINALLY got contacted to go on not one, but TWO interviews!!! I was so excited and nervous. I thought that my chance had finally come. I felt like both went really well. I had wanted one job over the other and funny thing was that the job I wanted turned me down. So. After I sent out my thank you letters, I get a response back from the job I didn't really want. (Actually, I had felt like that interview went better, but I really had wanted the other one!) They tell me that they were very impressed with my interview(I mean, what's not to be impressed about, right? ;) ) and they felt that I would be an asset to their organization. I immediately thought that I had been offered the job. I was so excited that I started texting everyone and their mother. Finally I was moving!! My time had come. ERRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTT! WRONG! Come to find out, I had to actually be offered the job by their HR department- the people who interview you just recommend that you get hired. UM. What? My first thought was "Oh. Crap. I told all these people that I was leaving and now I might not be? Crap." And my second thought was "Why didn't she tell me this when she was saying that she felt I would be an asset?" And my third thought was "What kind of screwed up system do they have?" I didn't get the job. I was crushed. I don't think I've taken such a hard blow in a long time. So what did I do? I think I bought all of Old Navy. I was sad for a while. I didn't really let on, b/c I was trying to look on the bright side, telling myself that God had something bigger and better. That only lasted for so long. I let myself continue to buy. For a while. Even after I felt better. Recently, I noticed that my spending kinda got out of control. IE: Using a credit card for a starbucks purchase. Either you have the actual money in your bank account, or you don't. Or you use your card and pay it back right away.
I felt it was time to do something that I have thought about doing for a long time.

Why have a card that I can just keep racking up a balance on? I've been trying to get myself out of debt for a while and haven't done well. So here's the first step. I can do whatever I set my mind to doing. It's gonna take time, but I want to be able to buy a house someday, go on a trip around Europe. I don't want to have to worry about what money I owe to credit cards. All in time.